The Art of Letting Go (of plants)

Imagine a summer day. No clouds are in the sky, the temperature is in the Upper 70s, the sunlight dances on your skin and there's a gentle breeze across your back. The pavement is just getting warm. Now imagine you feel all of that, but it's about 45 degrees outside. That was the tropical plant room.

Variegated Hoyas aren't that unusual but they're beautiful

Hoya carnosa, also known as wax flower, might be my favorite houseplant. Mine came from a cutting of a Hoya at the University of Illinois. Originally the cutting was variegated (white on the edges), but as it grew, it lost that variegation and became an attractive jade color. For about 6 years or so, it lived at my parent's home, then came with me to my dark, north facing office, then to my southwest facing apartment, and finally, my parents' home again. That 2 inch cutting I started with became a plant that exceeds three feet and thrives. Hoyas love warm temperatures, bright light and some moisture, but they'll tolerate dark dry rooms as well as bright humid rooms. The flowers are beautiful but I've only seen them bloom under greenhouse conditions.

When I started running out of space on my windowsill last week, I knew it was probably time to drop off some of the kids with the grandparents, so to speak. My mom nearly always has room for another plant, though I don't know for how much longer. Whenever they decide to move, I won't be able to rely on them to take care of my plants and I'll have to learn true restraint. Which brings me to the topic of the day:

Learn to let go

I'm not sure if you've heard of the 5 Rs of Recycling, but it's an idea you should take with you beyond the trash bin.

Refuse
Reduce
Reuse
Repurpose
and Recycle


Refuse - I've been called a plant hoarder in the past, but I almost never take a plant if I know I don't have the room for it. I may try to make room, but most of the time I just abandon the idea. Think about exactly where that plant is going to end up and how much time you're willing to spend taking care of it before you take it home (whether it's free or not). If the plant is in the store and you have other business there, finish the rest of your shopping first. If you still want the plant when your basket is full, then get it.

Reduce - Sometimes you just find a plant you love and you can't imagine living (or leaving) without it. Sometimes you find 20 plants you love and can't imagine leaving without them either. If you find yourself with an armful of plants, look through them a few times, decide where they'll go and if you need so many. If you're trying to fill a hole in your life, your garden or on your window ledge, realize that your plant is going to grow and if you need to divide it next year, you're going to have to figure out what to do with another half of your plant!

Reuse - Let's just call this one ...
(Re)Move - Sometimes those houseplants make great summer annuals. Look up the hardiness of your houseplants and keep an eye on temperatures if you're planning to bring it back inside. If you need to divide your house plant, consider putting half of it outside for the season and letting that half die over the winter. You'll still have your house plant, but you'll have a little more variety in your garden bed  too!

Repurpose - And this one we'll call...
Relocate - Find a friend or make a friend that wants a house plant. Split an old one or give away one that you no longer want to keep but don't want to throw away. College students often like houseplants. You might think I'm crazy, but having a plant can provide a sense of release and calm. It also provides an opportunity for a less experienced person to be responsible for a living thing. Make sure you tell them basic care instructions because a lot of people don't know how to care for plants. If you can't find someone to take your plant, you can always put a curb alert out on craigslist.

Recycle - I regret to suggest this option, but when it comes down to it, sometimes you just need to throw a plant away. Before you do throw that plant away, first...
Reconsider - If you're particularly attached to it, can you take cuttings or divide the plant to save space? Can you give the plant to someone - a friend, coworker, random stranger? Maybe you could press a leaf or flower and make it a part of an album of your former plants. How about you compost it, or, if you don't have a compost bin, ask someone that does. If you don't have any other options left, throw it out, but save the pot and the extra soil. You might be able to reuse those in the future.

Speaking for myself, it's really difficult to get rid of houseplants. They can help clean the air, provide a bit of relaxation, a sense of duty, a sense of nature, or a pleasant scent around the house. When you've had one for a particularly long time, it can certainly provide sentimental value, but sometimes you just have to let go and hope for the best.

It's much easier knowing that I can my visit my plants almost whenever I want than knowing that I had to throw them away, never to enjoy them again. It's more difficult than the accidental deaths that have happened in the past. It's harder than having to restrain myself in the first place.

So, let go. Give a good friend a plant that means something to you. They'll be more likely to think of you when they see it and you can rest easy knowing it lives on. 

Somewhat Cheap, Somewhat Healthy: Volume 1 - Food Basics

In years of keeping price in mind when buying and cooking with food, I have never been able to find a mind blowing way of using frozen spinach. I love fresh spinach and can tolerate canned spinach, but frozen spinach makes me want to cry. No matter what I do, I cannot make frozen spinach the star of the dish. Frozen spinach is, at best, a background actor. Cover it in tomato sauce, add garlic, croutons and/or ground beef, sprinkle with parmesan and then we can talk.

No matter what I'm making, there's a couple handfuls of ingredients I always look to.
1. Salt - "Salt makes food taste more like itself" adding a little bit of salt to a dish can dramatically improve its flavor, but make sure that if you're eating a lot of salty food, that you're also drinking enough water to help flush it out.
1a. - Monosodium glutamate or MSG - Somewhat controversial, this is (usually) my last ditch effort when I don't want to throw out a dish because it isn't working. I never buy the actual substance on its own. Instead I look for it in seasoning mixes or bouillon. The seasoning sauce known as "Maggi" , look for it in polish delis and ethnic grocery stores, is a good one to use because it can give food a wonderful umami flavor that can be hard to achieve.

MMMMMMM...SG

2. Oils and Fats - This ranges from peanut butter, olive oil, and vegetable oil to animal fats. Fats and oils help give food flavor. I also particularly like using olive oil when I roast vegetables in the oven because it helps it brown nicely and maintain moisture. Oils and fats also help lubricate pots and pans to prevent food from sticking or burning. Whenever I make a meat dish on the stove, I add a little water or vegetable stock to the pan after I'm done. Bringing that water to a low boil, I scrape off brown bits (don't ever scrape nonstick pans as this often ruins them) and add it to a jar that I keep in the refrigerator. I sometimes use this when cooking vegetables. It can make a vegetable dish much more hearty and satisfying.
3. Garlic - "Everyone uses garlic except the Pennsylvania Dutch, who just use a lot of butter" - Mo Rocca. Garlic in powdered or fresh form makes a great addition to most savory food. I keep a big container of powdered garlic (not garlic salt) within reaching distance in my cupboard. I also keep a couple beautiful cloves of garlic in the fridge for a couple of reasons, including as a natural remedy and for roasting.

I love garlic. I really do.

4. Onion (white or yellow) - I love onions because they pair well with a lot of foods. They can give a bite in their raw state or can impart sweetness when fried or sautéed. If you like the bite of onions but find it to be a bit too much, you can soak the onions in cold water for up to 15 minutes. It will take out most or all of the bite. Experiment with it to find out exactly how long is enough for you to tolerate their pungency.
5. Herbs and Spices - Black pepper, parsley, basil, rosemary, chili powder, and "all purpose seasoning" are probably some of the more common ones I'd suggest but everyone has different tastes and just because your friend likes rosemary, it doesn't mean you will. Think of a dish you like and then search a recipe site like allrecipes.com for that recipe. Find what herbs are common in that dish and you'll have an idea for what kind of herbs you should look into buying.
6. Acid - Lemons, limes, and vinegars are my most frequently used acidic ingredients. Acids can stimulate and sharpen flavors in a dish, increase sourness and/or suppress bitterness. Try balancing acid with salt. White vinegar and Apple Cider vinegar can also be used for a number of other purposes, including cleaning.
7. Sugar - I rarely use sugar when cooking so I debated including it, but I do use it when a dish has gone a bit sideways. I usually turn to sugar when my dish is too acidic or bitter. In certain cases I enjoy playing with sugar in salty dishes.

What works for me may not always work for you, but when it comes down to it, cooking is an art and it's open to interpretation. Remember though that just because you like your piece of art, that doesn't mean anyone else will. Strive for balance between sweet and bitter with sour and salty. Experiment in the kitchen and gain knowledge from places like Food Network and Saveur. I suggest watching any show where food is judged because you can learn a variety of cooking techniques, new ingredients, dos and don'ts, and tips.

I will be posting a Tool Basics edition either later this week or next week, so stay tuned.

My Gardening Origins

Home tastes like fresh, warm, homemade bread, spread with butter and topped with a slice of fresh tomato or cucumber, sprinkled lightly with salt.

I was fortunate (in some ways) to grow up in the suburbs of Chicago with parents that grew up in rural Poland. My mother was the master of the garden and my father her dutiful assistant. The garden palatte would change but tomatoes, cucumbers and beets were regulars in the garden. Almost all our meals were homemade with fresh ingredients. We, sometimes resentfully, helped mom in the garden; turning the soil, planting seeds, watering, planting tomatoes, staking tomatoes and picking the fruits of our labor. We also, almost always resentfully, helped dad pick the cherries, gooseberries, black, red, and white currents. While I didn't love picking currents, I certainly can't deny what beautiful plants they are. As a child playing in the backyard, they became potion ingredients for use in magical lands.

I remember the plants that lived in our yard, at least the most common ones- hostas, roses, peonies and iris, with a smattering of other plants, including annuals like zinnias, geraniums, petunias and impatiens. Impatiens were my favorite. The exploding seedpods are enough to get any kid's attention for a few seconds.

...and sweet alyssum everywhere

As I got older, I became interested in plants, not for their beauty for their function. Herbs struck me as a good way to make some extra money and a good way to start a business. The way I saw it, money might not have grown on trees, but a method to make money grew on plants!
I was wrong.
I tried selling catnip to friends with cats. Who doesn't like getting their cats high? Apparently most people. The ones that did tried it once and lost interest.

That didn't stop me dabbling in herbs. I grew Mint and Lemon Balm. I tried thyme and oregano for a bit but the thyme died out over the winter and the oregano lasted a few years before vanishing completely. I continued investing in the garden with other plants and then in high school I had a moment. I was looking into a microscope at a slide of plant cells when the universe shook around me. I had an epiphany. Beyond a shadow of a doubt, I wanted my future to include plants.

So I went to the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign to study Horticulture (with a focus in Science). I joined the horticulture club, became an assistant grower/grower and made some fantastic friends. I worked for a few years in the research greenhouses and at the plant clinic for a year. I worked with amazing people and fantastic instructors. When I left the University I worked for a time with some exceptional and intelligent people at the Chicago Botanic Garden. I had a garden and lost a garden. I made a few friends that I hope to meet up with again some day, but for now I am looking to the next part of my journey. I hope you'll join me.

Food and the Weight Game

It was Christmas morning. I must have been a few short weeks from turning 20. We sat on the 2 couches that flanked the balsam fir in the living room. I opened my parents gift to find a shirt I had desperately wanted. Yes! I looked at the tags: Large. "Oh, mom, I'm not a large, it's a size too small." "I guess you'll just have to lose some weight"

It was a crushing thing to hear.

At my heaviest, I weighed 210 pounds (95.25kg or 15 stone). Two years spent in the University dorms didn't help either. The salad bar was always stale and everything else just seemed to taste terrible. The only thing that I could get in my mouth to satisfy my stomach was pizza and the seemingly endless supply of Mt. Dew from the fountain drink station. It didn't help that my body didn't tolerate dairy well at that point, either. Slow digestion of high calorie foods combined with sugary drinks is a recipe for disaster.

That's me in my favorite shirt at the time

Starting in May, I rented an efficiency apartment and continued working in the research greenhouses for the summer. It wasn't much, but I had a computer, elementary cooking supplies, elementary cooking knowledge, and an internet connection. I also went out and bought a scale for the bathroom.

A brief pause here, because what I want you to understand is that I didn't do this for my parents. I didn't really do it for myself either. I was finally out and the way I saw things, no one wanted the big fat slob. I wasn't the gay guy you see on TV. I was a hairy little whale and while there wasn't much I could do about the hair or the height (I'm 5'9", about average), at least I could fix my weight and I'd be a little closer to the artificial ideal of the gay sitcom star.

So, I had a plan: Learn about metabolism and how to boost it. No cheese. Cut back on carbs. Drink a lot of water. Switch to tea and diet soda (hard to give up those fizzies). Check my weight every morning and every night.
Eventually the plan included eating a majority of my calories in the morning, allowing me to treat myself from time to time, lifting hand weights and running or going on walks during nice nights.

My plan was based in research, trying to find any suggestions on losing those pounds. I didn't make a lot at the greenhouses and my parents helped support me. I didn't want to be a burden on them, so I bought relatively cheap food; Canned soup, canned tuna, eggs, lots of vegetables, a few sauces, herbs, and spices. I made soup a lot. I want you to understand, I wasn't making Progresso, I was making generic condensed soup, nothing fancy. I quickly learned how to spice it up by adding vegetables and adding a little acid (like lemon juice, not LSD). My other main dish was stir fry. There's nothing so simply as heating a mixture of vegetables really briefly in a pan for an easy dinner. I learned about browning my meat before baking it to help seal in the juices and how to poach an egg without one of those convenient little poaching devices. I spent about $30 a week on food, which some people can't even afford, but it was enough to get me started on the path to a good weight.

So the weight started coming off. Roughly 2.5 pounds a week. This was intentional. I wanted to lose 10 pounds a month, which my research told me was an acceptable rate to lose weight. So I lost 10 pounds, and another 10 pounds, and another 10 pounds...

I don't think anyone really understands my love of squash

When I had dropped down to 150 in the Autumn of my grand weight loss year, it felt good. I accomplished so much and I finally felt attractive. I still wanted to lose weight, maybe because I was pursuing the ideal or maybe because I wasn't skinny enough, like those lanky twinks I envied.
In losing weight, there was also a certain thrill in passing people who knew me freshman year or in high school. How they would have to look twice at this person that looked so familiar to them. I also seemed to draw the envy of relatives, mostly women, who wanted to know how I lost so much weight.
Losing weight was like being a new person, but the world was somewhat less comfortable now. Concrete benches and some bicycle seats were painful, some of the people that knew you as overweight complained that you were "too skinny" now. People who used to not look at you twice now look at you, it's a double edged sword that reminds you how shallow the world is, intentional or not.

By late Autumn, my plan focused on counting calories and I was able to lose a little more, and a little more, and a little more...

By the time January rolled around, I weighed 135 pounds.

Actually this was November but it's close enough

Over the next few months, I gained some of my weight back. A little bit of it was to satisfy others but much of it was because I had been unkind to people that didn't deserve it, including myself.
I wanted to drink wine and eat cheese, crackers, cookies, or whatever I goddamn pleased. I've heard that happiness is not derived from money or things, but from experiences, so I experienced. I scanned recipes online to figure out how certain food dishes are made and what foods go with what. I messed around in the kitchen, and still do, sometimes with success, sometimes with horrifying failure. I stopped focusing on my body and focused on food. I avoided processed food because it was more fun, tasty and satisfying to make my own meals. I'm really happy with who I turned out to be.

I'm still working on myself but I'm content with my weight. If you're someone that wants to lose weight, I have a few suggestions: cut out or cut down on dairy and things like grains or bread. Say what you will about dairy or gluten, but most people seem to better digest the food that lacks it. Drink water and get fiber in your diet (if you like or can learn to like beans, do it, but those chocolate Fiber One bars are amazing). Work out. Lifting weights builds muscle which burns fat to sustain itself. If nothing is working, figure out your BMR and eat roughly that many calories per day, mostly toward the beginning of the day. If still nothing is working, go see a dietician, not a nutritionist. Most importantly, learn to be comfortable with your body. You don't have to love your body, but you shouldn't be ashamed of it. Just get to a place where you're comfortable.

Apologies for the long story but I wanted to let you into my life. If you've made it this far, you deserve a high-five for being so awesome. I will be regularly posting stories and/or recipes about food every Tuesday. I hope you will remember to visit but if you are the forgetful type, please subscribe.



Postscript:
No one has ever addressed me with concerns about my weight loss being obsessive to the point of anorexia. Anorexia nervosa is a serious condition that can be treated with the help of a therapist, psychiatrist, or medical professional. If you are concerned about you or someone you know having an eating disorder, visit http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org. There is a help line listed if you need someone to talk to.